Having been put in Facebook jail on more than one occasion and issued strikes against me on Youtube, I had to express my feelings about these odious fact checkers in song. As in many of my songs, the narrator takes the voice of the bad guys.
Listen here on Soundcloud and share if you can:
FACT CHECKER
I’m a lonely Fact Checker
Guaranteed a home-wrecker
This is what I like to do
You’ll never find me lax
‘Cause I just deal in facts
Now I am coming after you
Just listen I’m your teacher
A blatant over-reacher
You need to answer when I call
I determine truth
By always finding proof
Now it’s time for you to fall
Chorus:
When you get it wrong
I’ll start to sing my song
That you have fallen off the tracks
All of it depends
If you can make amends
Otherwise there’s no turning back
Yes I’m your director
Never your protector
Please don’t ever stand too tall
You can sadly bet
They’ll be much regret
When you decide you won’t play ball
Bridge: I’m the boss and you’ll be lost
Pretending you’re the missing link
Use your wits, cause if your facts don’t fit
Just what are people gonna think?
I’m a lonely Fact Checker
Guaranteed a home-wrecker
Do you want to lose your job?
You’ll be all alone, stuck indoors at home
Feeling like a useless slob
Call me a real player
A certified doomsayer
I’ll make sure you win first prize
Yes I have got your back
When you have all the facts
So nice you’re saving so many lives
Chorus: We’ll put you to the test
Just be like the rest
Or else you’re gonna have to hide
If you don’t play along
You’ll find you don’t belong
It’s never good to buck the tide
There is no one finer
Call me a designer
I design the fact check codes
If your facts aren’t right
We’ll condemn you as a blight
Ensuring that you will implode
Instrumental on chorus and two verses
Chorus: When you get it wrong
I’ll start to sing my song
That you have fallen off the tracks
All of it depends
If you can make amends
Otherwise there’s no turning back
I’m a lonely, fact checker
Guaranteed a home-wrecker
This is what I like to do
You’ll never find me lax
‘Cause I just deal in facts
Now I’m coming after you….after you
Now I’m coming after you
Nice. I got fact checked once and spent 30 days in Fakebook jail. So proud of myself.
Yes, there are hired killers out there:
https://rayhorvaththesource.substack.com/p/hired-killers